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Family: Aunt Edna
Outside: A few things you can always count on for your birthday
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Inside: Someone giving you a box of wine and Aunt Edna hiding the cake in the toilet (Happy Birthday)
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NEW
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Family: Grandma Thong
Outside: On the advice of her sister, Thelma opted for thong undies...
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Inside: It was her one birthday regret. Happy Birthday
(Looks like another birthday crept up on you!)
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NEW
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Friends: Hater Girls
Outside: You know why we get along so well?
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Inside: Because we hate the same people! Happy Birthday Doll Face!
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NEW
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Life: Jack's Birthday
Outside: Jack smoked, drank & loved the ladies
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Inside: But it was his annual birthday skydive that finally did him in.
Hope your birthday is a smashing success
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NEW
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Life: Present Size
Outside: It's not the size of the present...
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Inside: It's the voltage! Have an electrifying Birthday!
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NEW
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Life: Say Cheese
Outside: Oh, you said "Smile and say cheese?" I thought you said "Be grim as you please."
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Inside: My bad! Sorry for the miscommunication. Happy (belated) Birthday!!!
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NEW
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Family: Smelled It
Outside: They both smelled it, but neither admitted who dealt it...
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Inside: So don't worry, your true age is also a secret with me.
Happy Birthday, you ol; stinker.
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NEW
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Life: SWAT
Outside: The S.W.A.T. team is on the way...
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Inside: You've held your age hostage long enough! Happy Birthday
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NEW
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Life: Tiger Lady
Outside: It's your birthday! And you can celebrate however you want...
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Inside: But... maybe you should put the kids to bed first! Happy Birthday
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NEW
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Friends: Wild Times
Outside: Marge & Alice reminisced about all the wild times they had when they were younger...
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Inside: Wait... There were no wild times *sigh*
Make it wild!!! Happy Birthday!
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NEW
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Family: Zipper
Outside: Mom really stepped it up a notch...
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Inside: ...when I started dropping the F-bomb.
Happy F***ing birthday!
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NEW
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Family: Aunt Ralph
Outside: Happy Birthday?
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Inside: Aunt Ralph has arrived. No, even though she's entertaining, we didn't pay her...invite her! (Don't let your relatives ruin your birthday)
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BUY ME |
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Life: Fortune Teller
Outside: I have your birthday prediction
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Inside: You are old. Happy Birthday
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BUY ME |
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Life: Clown Hand
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Inside: Even though there was a downturn in the economy, I still got you a
clown for your birthday.
(...and there was even a little something left for a band)
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BUY ME |
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Life: House Fire
Outside: Happy Birthday!
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Inside: We were only supposed to yell "surprise" (warm wishes)
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BUY ME |
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What-the-Hell: Joan
Outside: According to her neighbors..
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Inside: Joan was always peculiar. This birthday was no different. She stood at the end of the world and played hypnotic polkas to small feeble minded lemmings, as they leaped from the rocky cliff into the icy waters of wonder below.
(Don't worry what the neighbors think. Hope your birthday is over the edge)
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BUY ME |
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Advice: Marvin Wish
Outside: Be careful what you wish for
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Inside: On Marvin's birthday he wished for music in his life and eternal
happiness. (Think before you wish).
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BUY ME |
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Fun: Marvin Bangs
Outside: Marvin didn't think anything could top last year's birthday
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Inside: But this year...He banged and banged and banged! It was his best
birthday ever! (Go Bananas!)
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BUY ME |
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Life: Pinata
Outside: You scream "candy"'
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Inside: I scream "ouch". You're not the only one who thinks birthdays are
painful! (I hope your birthday is a big hit)
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BUY ME |
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What-the-Hell: PresentPast
Outside: Your present...
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Inside: ran off with your past. Happy Birthday
(There's a birthday message in their somewhere)
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BUY ME |
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Family: Teddy
Outside: For your birthday I wanted to give you a card that could express everything I feel
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Inside: But my therapist advised against it.
So I'll just stick with "happy birthday"
.
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BUY ME |
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Fun: Tired
Outside: Tired of birthdays?
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Inside: Wishing you less wear and more mileage.
Have a happy birthday and another good year.
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BUY ME |
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Fun: Twins
Outside: This birthday the only thing we ain't got planned...
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Inside: Is a trip to the tattoo parlor. (maybe next year)
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BUY ME |
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Age: Blue Hair
Outside: Hey, Dollface!
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Inside: At our age blue is finally in! Happy Birthday!
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BUY ME |
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Sarcastic: CPR
Outside: As you get older...
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Inside: "Party till ya drop" has new meaning. Happy Birthday
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BUY ME |
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What-the-Hell: Gnomes
Outside: And they followed the sound of the sea, the three wise gnomes did, every years on the eve of your birth, to rejoice and sing and yodel.
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Inside: The the tide came in. Happy Birthday
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BUY ME |
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Only Friends Can Say: Need Cake
Outside: You need another birthday...
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Inside: Like I need another piece of cake
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BUY ME |
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Age: Pulling Dress
Outside: Remember when...
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Inside: Pulling up your dress was socially acceptable? Happy Birthday!
(Those were the good old days)
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BUY ME |
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Only Friends Can Say: Size Six
Outside: Wish you could be six again?
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Inside: Size 6. Happy Birthday
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BUY ME |
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What-the-Hell: Stupid Card
Outside: I'm a little teapot, short and stout, here is my handle, here is my...
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Inside: Stupid birthday card for you. Happy Birthday
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BUY ME |
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Life: Titanic
Outside: Birthdays are like a boat ride on the Titanic
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Inside: You never know when it may be your last.
(Party like there's no tomorrow)
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BUY ME |
